Blue. It's my favorite color. It's also a way to express how i'm feeling: i'm feeling blue.

And i know that feeling down every once in a while is normal. Our body has its ups and downs, and the downs usually make us feel sad, emotional, sensitive--think PMS but it happens to everyone, and it's not a cyclical time of the month.

Remember Picasso's "Blue Period?" Where all his paintings were in tones of blue and they really pulled at your heart strings and made you want to eat something indulgent and cry?




Yeah. That's how my week has been.

The only way i can explain it, is that i've felt trapped the last couple of days. Stagnant. Like the world is moving quickly by me, but i'm trudging through molasses. And when i realize that i can't move quickly, my heart begins to beat rapidly and i feel desperate.

It's a mixture of low self-confidence, confusion, a sense of being lost, and maybe a little unrequited love. All these things put together really effing suck. They make me feel invisible. And so doubtful. And i know that i'm not. i know that i'm a good friend and a good daughter and a good sister. but am i a good person? Does no one want to walk alongside me on this crazy adventure we call life?

i know it sounds psycho. i bet you're all thinking, "woah. This chick is crazy; worrying about all this stuff. Calm down and stop whining."

Well, sir or madam, i say to you: "fuck off. i'm allowed to feel a little blue and despondent. Picasso did and his Blue Period paintings are now worth millions."



So, maybe there's value to all this "blueness." It might not be millions of dollars, but it may teach us something priceless about ourselves when the blueness is over.